What Do You Do On Memorial Day?

Is Memorial Day more than a summer kick-off for you and your family? Barbecues, a long weekend, end of school...it usually is a pivotal weekend that ushers in summer fun.

Memorial Day was officially proclaimed on May 5, 1868 by General John Logan. Different states claim to take credit for establishing Memorial Day traditions.

Early on, our family focused on Memorial Day as the beginning of summer. I didn't pay alot of attention to the real meaning of the holiday until my father passed away. He was a veteran and was buried at Fort Snelling. That introduced me to all the patriotic speeches and parades that were held at the cemetary in honor of fallen soldiers. I am sorry to say it took me many years to appreciate Memorial Day for anything more than a summer kick-off. I highly recommend a day trip to Fort Snelling for summer fun anytime during the summer.

In tribute to my father, we began taking our kids to the cemetary during the Memorial Day weekend. We decorated the grave and always read many different headstones. Looking back, I am so thankful that my dad actually left this legacy for me and my family. I don't think I would have been as intentional as I was. Exposing them to the miles of white grave stones each displaying an American flag was breathtaking.

We would come home from our visit and I would make my dad's favorite sandwich!

Olive/Nut Sandwiches
1/2 cup of green olives
1/2 cup of walnuts
Mayo to blend.
Mix all together and serve on a soft bread for a different sandwich experience! My dad loved these!

If you haven't given Memorial Day too much emphasis in your family, I would encourage you to re-consider and personalize it by visiting your relatives' gravesites and talking about their influence in your life. Maybe find a new recipe to share each Memorial Day that is exclusive to your family! Expand it by talking about our nation and the freedoms we enjoy because of the men and women who are willing to defend our country.

If you are like me, you will learn along with your family!

Summer Fun

Memorial Day is this weekend! The weather has been so cool, it has snuck up on me. Are you ready for the summer? Whether you are planning a summer filled with kids' activities, a summer with your husband or a summer with friends, it all requires planning.

Yes, we are anticipating the long lazy, hazy, crazy days of summer, but if they are going to be enjoyable, they need to be planned. Think about your summers. Think about your husband and/or kids and think about what they may be dreaming their summers will look like. It is very easy to become a drill sergent and demand that things go your way.

When my kids were little, I started planning early. Summer registrations for swim lessons, camps and Bible School were often closed if I didn't think ahead.

If you haven't enrolled your kids in a ton of activities, good for you. That leaves more time for you to interact with your children.

First, start with a large calendar with alot of room to write! Schedule the activities that are necessary to do and put them at the designated time slot. If your calendar appears too full, start eliminating activities. That's right! Open up time on your calendar to hang out and enjoy one another this summer.

Secondly, make a list of all the fun things that are a possibility for you to do this summer. Summer concerts, canoeing down the creeks, making ice cream, identifying midnight stars, sleeping in your backyard...keep this list handy and add to it as ideas come to mind. Refer to this list on those days that you have 'nothing to do' or an afternoon that opens up for you.

Finally, assign a special task for each day of the week. Pat Mersiowsky is a mother of four. I love her idea! She named each day in a fun way so her kids could anticipate what each day would bring:

Monday...Music Monday. Enjoy some form of music during the day (hands-on for kids!)
Tuesday...Tasty Tuesday. Time for cooking, tasty new treats, improving your diet!
Wednesday...Wacky Wednesday. A time to be a kid...crazy jokes, backward clothes, etc
Thursday...Thoughtful Thursday. Think about others. Have a secret sibling to care for.
Friday...Field Trip Friday. Walk a new neighborhood. Play in a new park. Nothing big, just get out and see something new!
Saturday...Skillful Saturday. Learn a new skill. Make crafts. 'Create stuff' with dad

Summer with friends, your husband or a pack of kids requires planning, but that is what will make those lazy,hazy, crazy days of summer memorable.

Don't you wish you had been there?

I'm not sure I'd say that a wise woman eats, but in New York we definitely enjoyed the food! Here's some more take aways....

You can never carry too many snacks

Don’t weigh yourself before you go; don’t weigh yourself when you come home

Be sure to eat a slice of New York Pizza – and smile because two grumpy old men made it for you

$2 hot dogs on the corner of Times Square hit the spot

Chocolate chip pancakes with real whip cream are too good for words

Eat another slice of New York Pizza

Our special four-dish pasta platter must have been made by the Godfather and the mafia themselves

Gelato tastes like ice cream…kinda

Metro Diner - where everyone knows your name and the food is greasy goodness (i.e., huge burgers and fries served with two kinds of gravy)

Don’t pass up seconds on dessert – especially when it’s free

Barbara and Stacy

Wish you were here…

Barb and I spent the last five days in New Jersey and New York for a family wedding. Here are a few lessons learned and experiences we won't soon forget:

Traveling with a 91-year-old grandma in a wheelchair gets you to the front of the ticket line and security line at the airport

Soak up every moment - soon it will all be over

Riding in an NYC taxi is an unforgettable experience

Don’t look at the clock when you’re up late conversing with family

Smile when your 31-year-old son picks you up and swings you around the dance floor in his arms

Laughter and storytelling unites every family, everywhere

Have a schedule but flexibility is key

Buying your Broadway tickets at a discount one hour before the show gets you a great deal

If you find yourself in Harlem you’ve made a wrong turn

There are endless ways to experience NYC: on foot, by taxi, on the Subway, by train

Hold your valuables close or soon they’ll become someone else’s valuables

$5 umbrellas on the street corner are well worth the price when rain fills the sky

It doesn’t matter the size of your property – it’s all very expensive in NYC

Plan ahead – parking may take up to two hours…or better yet, take a taxi

Bring your walking shoes – that’s the best way to experience local life in NYC

NYC knows how to cram a lot of stuff into very little spaces

Delis don’t just sell deli food – they sell just about anything and everything

NYC is a melting pot of people, culture and language

Did You Know?

Did you know it was a woman who wrote America the Beautiful? Back in 1893, Katharine Lee Bates was a professor at Wellesley College and spent some time in Colorado teaching summer school. During a break from teaching, a group of teachers visited Pike’s Peak which has an elevation of 14,000 feet. She wrote,
“We hired a prairie wagon. Near the top we had to leave the wagon and go the rest of the way on mules. I was very tired. But when I saw the view, I felt great joy. All the wonder of America seemed displayed there, with the sea-like expanse…
It was then and there, as I was looking out over the sea-like expanse of fertile country spreading away so far under those ample skies that the opening lines of the hymn floated into my mind. When we left Colorado Springs the four stanzas were penciled in my notebook…. I do not remember paying heed to these verses until the second summer following, when I copied them out and sent them to The Congregationalist, where they first appeared in print July 4, 1895…”

Katharine was on vacation from her routine, but not on vacation from being inspired! As you celebrate this 4th of July weekend, or go on your vacation later this summer, write down your thoughts and wonders. Don’t discount the beauty of your thoughts and who knows, maybe we will find ourselves singing your praises some day.
“May God shed His grace on thee.”

Va-ca-tion: "Freedom or release from duty, business or activity"

That is how Webster defines a vacation. When you return home and you find you have had a nice break in your schedule, you have had freedom from the routine, you are ready to return to the everyday demands with new enthusiasm and strength.
Returning home requires sensitivity to your children and husband as well. Time spent together is wonderful, but coming home gives everyone their own sense of space again. Give your children time to unpack their treasures and display them. We always encouraged our kids to 'save before traveling; buy souvenirs wisely' and then come home and remember the fun by having the souvenirs a highlight in the their rooms or used as a centerpiece for a week when we returned. Normal schedules crowd out the memories so as a mom, make an effort to keep those memories alive abit longer.
I invested in rolls of film rather than buy souvenirs for myself. I would be busy for weeks after a vacation organizing and putting them into a scrapbook so we could relive our travels at anytime. Today, scrapbooking is so easy to do just remember to do it and don't get caught up in having it be a masterpiece, have it something the kids can get their hands on and share with friends.
From an early age, have your kids 'sign off' on the vacation. Either write their names in the scrapbook or write a short paragraph of what they thought was the most fun. If you have babies or toddlers, have them press a handprint or color a line or two, just to indicate their age and ability. This will be a fun measuring stick over the years. A family photo by the car or by your house before you leave is a good reminder as to what your family looked like and where you were living or what you were driving. In time, these photos are some of the best to look back and 'remember'.

Vacations, all good things must end. I hope these few postings will make this summer a time to remember for you and your family.

Vacations and Your Husband!

I have had the privilege and responsibility to work along side my husband in several businesses during our marriage. I have seen first hand the day to day stress a man is under to provide for his family so I would be remiss if I didn't post a blog about HIS vacation. Men need a vacation too. I think there may be too much said about a wife and all her responsibility and that voice gets heard above the one that says a man needs to know he can look forward to a vacation where his wife enjoys his company. I don't want to write about WHAT to do with your husband on a vacation, with or without kids, but rather to encourage young wives to practice taking vacations with your husband while your family is young...or even before you have kids. Practice taking a vacation from nagging, from criticizing, from worry, from 'keeping up with the Jones'. Practice talking with enthusiasm, encouragement, optimism and wearing a smile around your husband. It used to be said that a home is a man's castle...I don't know about that, but it does need to be a place where he is welcomed and where he anticipates a time with his family that renews and satisfies him. When you take off for vacation, talk with your husband about his expectations, what he wants to see and experience and then tuck that away and make an effort to make your husband's desires become a bit more of a reality. I know it is alot to cover and you have your hands full with the kids, but being aware of your husband's time away will only increase everyone's time to enjoy and grow closer together.

Vacations...traveling in the car...with KIDS!!

There are some parts of parenting I really had to grow into. Traveling in the car with kids would be one of them!! Before kids, I would look forward to reading a good book or doing handwork as the miles passed by. With kids, it's a whole new ball game. Looking back, even to my childhood, traveling in the confines of a car can give you a great opportunity to build memories and good times with your kids. Don't miss it! Turn off the fancy DVD players and IPods and play games. Trust me on this, it will tire you out, but your family will remember the fun forever. I don't know why, maybe it's because of the close quarters or the attention they are getting from mom and dad, it is not to be missed.

Counting Cars
Keep score on the number of white (or any color you designate) vans that pass by you. Count the number of trucks ( have dad honk his horn when you pass a truck and if the truck honks back, give yourself another point!) Change what you are looking for if you are on the road for several days (sport cars, red cars, motorcycles, etc). It's a good way to build attention span, yours and your child's!!

Alphabet Game
I bet you played that as a kid...and you still remember it! Even pre-schoolers can get into this. Look for bill boards, signs, storefronts, road signs, etc (cars go by too quickly for kids to read the license plates) and find the letter A. Then find B and on through the alphabet. The letters can be any place in a word. Work as teams and the first team to get to Z is the winner. When your kids are young, work as a family so there is no winner or loser...you all get farther down the road together!

License plates
Look for license plates when you stop. Check out the parked cars and keep a list of all the states that you find for each trip. I think one trip we found a license from every state! Since we had played this game so often we knew what a feat that was!

Have fun
That's the point of playing together. There used to be big billboards along the road that said "The family that plays together, stays together"! We used to take 'letters' off that sign for our game, but now I look back and see the impact both the game and the billboard had in my life.

On Vacation with Kids...the practical part

As a young mom, I had no idea how to put a vacation together...here are a few random tips that helped me survive the first few years of traveling:

Make a master list of the basic items you need everytime. Pack the list with your maps or camping gear or whatever else you reach for when you think of 'vacation'!

Make a master list of what YOU need to get you through a vacation. As a mom, you will find that you pack for yourself last and then forget important stuff...I suggest if you have a master list of what you need...you will survive! I always needed a small notebook to record my thoughts and write down our daily activities. I always had a pen, chapstick, sunglasses, sunscreen, personal items like tampons(always take a supply, you don't want to be surprised while you're traveling!) that wouldn't get packed unless I made a special point of it.

The computer can organize you and your family so much better than I did when I relied on paper and pencil, but you need to be the driving force to have it meet your needs. Do it months before your trip so you just check off the items as you pack them.

As your child grows, have them make a 'travel bag list' on the computer so they are ready to hit the road without forgetting the essentials. This works good for sleep overs as well.

One tip you may remember from your childhood is the potion for sunburn. Pack a small bottle of vinegar if you are going to the beach. Mix a 50-50 solution of water and vinegar and wipe on a bad sunburn. Works great for babies and toddlers...but better advice is to bring plenty of sunscreen to prevent the burns.

As always, preparation is key to the success. So start now and make your master lists. Adjust them as your children age and before you know it, you will be back to packing for just you and your husband again. So enjoy the hassle!

On Vacation with Kids...

The same thoughts I shared about vacations yesterday apply here, but if you are just getting into the 'swing' of traveling with kids, you are probably realizing it is NO vacation!! It is hard work. It is tiring. It is uncomfortable and expensive. So why do you go to all that trouble? First, you may feel like it is the 'thing to do'. Go to Disneyland, travel to the Black Hills, camp at Jellystone. Advertisers and "The Joneses" put alot of pressure on young families to 'do it all' and 'do it all in style and ease'. Can I be the voice of reason (and experience) here and say, go on a vacation to relax and reconnect and anything beyond that is a bonus. You may choose to go to the fancy, fun places but do it to relax and reconnect. If that isn't happening on your vacation, maybe you shouldn't go to all the trouble.
I was the 'picture-taker' in our family and I now look back on the photos from early vacations and I not only see the photos I took, I also remember the attitudes that were expressed during that time. Sometimes we were cranky and tired. Sometimes my husband and I were struggling with staying civil and sometimes we were just faking a smile to make it look good for the snapshot. I learned over the years that those pictures aren't priceless, they bear the marks of a 'forboding cloud' hovering over our vacations...and I needed to once again be the mom and get focused on why we were vacationing and what I could do to enhance our time together. Those photos are just a reminder to me to make sure that our vacations were about reconnecting and building GOOD memories and therefore a good family. If a photoshoot had to wait in order to fix some hurt feelings or if we missed a good shot because the rest of the family was tired and had enough, that became my measure of a priceless photo album. I can now look at my vacation albums and see how my family grew but I also can track and see how I grew and became a better mom and wife because I kept my expectations to a minimum and my 'wonder' to the max.
Vacations are necessary to reconnect and see each other in a different setting. They offer an opportunity to develop patience, encourage one another, love each other even when it's hard. It's a time to say I'm sorry quickly because the vacation has a deadline and you don't want to carry a grudge through all the fun times. Vacations are for memories. Vacations are to learn. Vacations can be a mountain top experience or a valley...but they always make coming home a time for reflection. Know why you are traveling with kids and then go and enjoy it!!

On Vacation...

This past week, both Stacy and I were on vacation! Unfortunately, we didn't go together, but we will have good stories to share when she finally returns to town. She and Ryan are on a mission's trip and you will hear more of that later.
The rest of our family headed up North to enjoy the woods, biking, fishing and alot of relaxing! Just before we left, I was once again smitten with the dreaded question of 'why am I doing this?' Going on 'vacation' is just too much work to make it worth while, so... 'note to myself...don't plan another one!' I have this conversation with myself almost everytime I pack up to leave my home and work. I think that should be a clue that I really do NEED a vacation.
This week I took a break from work, study, routine and just about everything. I made it a priority to only relax and reconnect with each member of my family. We did have to cut our week short by a day because of work, but I can sit and type this posting with a smile on my face, knowing vacation did it's magic and I am once again ready to face the everyday demands with patience and enthusiasm. What I would really like to share in this posting is the big realization I had years ago when I had little ones around my ankles and I was trying to pull off the perfect vacation.
1. I learned there is no such thing as 'planning a perfect vacation'. Perfect vacations do happen...but they happen because I was open to letting things fall into place and I was not trying to control everything.
2. I learned that vacations are like 'life'! If I increased my 'wonder' factor and decreased my 'expectation' level, it would help me take in everything that came along with patience and intrique rather than disappointment and anger.
3. Like life, vacations go by quickly, so I have had to learn to be in the moment and enjoy the new sights, sounds, food, interruptions, 'plan B's' and all the rest in order to really experience my vacation to the fullest.
4. I have come to realize that when I am in Colorado (or wherever I may be vacationing), it is best to enjoy all that Colorado has to share. I may never get back there again. So too with life, enjoy where I am in life today, there are no 'do overs'!

Vacationing with kids? Well, I'll share my thoughts with you on that tomorrow....