Monday, November 9

Husbands and the Holidays

"Husbands and the Holidays"...is that an oxymoron at your house? I mean, does your husband 'get in the way' of all that you have to do to get the holidays moving? Does he understand what it takes to 'do' Thanksgiving and Christmas?

I heard one husband say he always knew the holidays were coming because his wife fell into a "Pre-Thanksgiving Day Twit" every year:
She wanted everything to be perfect.
She wanted her home to look good
Her children to act right
...Her husband to 'fall in line'

It took me a long time to realize that the way I could counteract 'My Twit' was to include my husband in a lot of my planning for the holidays.

He is the leavening agent that keeps me sane. He always comes back to the real reason for celebrating and isn't so swayed by the decorations I need to buy or the extra memory I want to make.

Together we will decide who we want to entertain.

We'll talk about how much we want to spend.

I lay my expectations out to him so he will know what is behind my busy days.

Remember, I've been married 38 years and this has been a process. But I have found it an invaluable focus as I go into the holidays every year. Making my husband a priority has set an example for our kids. It truly is a family time...when there is family unity.

I think we can all get in a 'Twit' this time of year. If you haven't already identified that maybe some of the problem is that you are going up against your husband...or ignoring him completely, be honest and give it some thought.

It sounds good to be a wise woman. To have a quiet and gentle spirit. But somehow we think that excludes this time of year!

I think embracing your husband's ideas and input is a way to make your holidays fit your family...and a way to actually be wise throughout this busy season. I know your holiday will take on a different look than what you expected if you were to do it all yourself, but I also know there will be more harmony and sense of family if you begin to plan for this busy time together.

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