The History of a Marriage

I attended a funeral last week of a man who had been married for 32 years...13 of those years he spent as a husband and father...19 years he spent totally paralyzed as a result of a stroke. The stroke was so severe it left him without the capacity to walk, talk or interact in any way but to blink his eyes.

The funeral was packed. Many friends and family members spoke of this man's faith and contribution to his family. They spoke of his sense of humor. They told of his perseverence and his incredible spirit of forgiveness as he dealt with aides that were less than civil to him.

They spoke of his wife.

For 19 years, she raised 4 children and made all the necessary adjustments needed to continue on and build her home. And she did. At one point in the service, we all stood up and gave the family a standing ovation...just prompted by the moment...to tell the wife and kids that they had just completed a long journey and it was time for them to hear that it was a job 'well-done'.

I couldn't help but think that if that had been me, left with 4 kids and an invalid husband would I carry on with such grace and love? Nowadays, I've got to believe people wouldn't encourage a spouse to endure such a lonely path when a simple divorce might ease the situation abit. I have to believe this wife received wise counsel and tons of encourage to stay and rely on the Lord to get her through some mighty tough days.

Marriages are built by life-shaping experiences. Events that have a lasting impact on who we are and how we live. We are building history as we build a marriage. That history is the super-glue that can hold a marriage together if it is given a chance.

This weary wife stood in front of the congregation and shared some of her family's history last week. A history that was possible because she chose to do the right thing. She chose to remember her vows of commitment. This was a wise woman who truly BUILT her home...and now has a history of a remarkable marriage to share.